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  1. #11
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Second Coast, Ross-shire, overlooking Gruinard Bay.
    Posts
    7,380

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    Boat-hook - A length of wood/tubing with a hook on one end;
    1. the wood is six inches shorter than the distance to the mooring buoy/marina pontoon/item floating away astern.
    2. The hook is invariably at the wrong end in an emergency.

    Chart - A sheet of paper designed to prevent damage/staining to a chart table from spilled drinks/soup, vomit, diesel and paint/varnish.

    Flares - A mode of dress when you first started boating.

    Anchor - A piece of equipment, the practicalities/effectiveness of which it is guaranteed that not one single boater can agree on.

    Spray canopy/hood - A fabric device so situated as to shelter from deluge by sea-water all crew members, except the helmsman/woman.

    Antifoul - Your mother's/father's sibling with body-odour/bowel problems when aboard your craft
    Kay Sarah Sarah
    57°51.42' N 5°29.44' W

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Solent, UK
    Posts
    4,629

    Cool Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    This thread:- an unsuccessful attempt to put tyros off sailing so there's more searoom for the rest of us....
    Grow old disgracefully, it's more fun

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    West London
    Posts
    2,927

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    Quote Originally Posted by Stemar View Post
    Boom A device for rendering vertical crew members horizontal; named after the noise it make when doing so.
    An cultured ozzie guy once told me that "boom was the noise a blackfeller makes when he hits the Roo bars".

  4. #14
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Second Coast, Ross-shire, overlooking Gruinard Bay.
    Posts
    7,380

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    tch tch tch
    Kay Sarah Sarah
    57°51.42' N 5°29.44' W

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    West London
    Posts
    2,927

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    Quote Originally Posted by Robert Wilson View Post
    tch tch tch
    What do you expect from an antipodean?

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Turning Left this season?-Nach Friesians?
    Posts
    3,963

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    BOAT=break out another thousand “£”.
    and
    A Boat= a hole in the water into which you pour Time, Money, sweat, blood and knuckle skin,having spent the kids inheritance on it in the first place
    Last edited by Tidewaiter2; 13-09-19 at 17:06.
    "Journos Luxury Yacht"=a hole in the water for time, money,affection,blood,sweat n tears

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Belgium
    Posts
    1,708

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    Quote Originally Posted by scotty123 View Post
    An cultured ozzie guy once told me that "boom was the noise a blackfeller makes when he hits the Roo bars".
    Please define ‘Cultured Ozzie’

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    East coast UK. Mostly. Sometimes the Philippines
    Posts
    9,790

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    Quote Originally Posted by Sandy View Post
    Radar reflectors - A bigger device to hook halyards.
    Quote Originally Posted by westhinder View Post
    Please define ‘Cultured Ozzie’
    I had a colleague in Hong Kong thirty years ago who was the son of the Australian Broadcasting Commission, had impeccable manners when he needed them and could discuss opera.. None the less, he was known to walk up to women and say “I’m Australian. My name’s Brian. Wanna f**k?” He told me that this worked often enough for him not to waste time and money on other methods.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    S.W. France
    Posts
    7,678

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    Quote Originally Posted by Minn View Post
    I had a colleague in Hong Kong thirty years ago who was the son of the Australian Broadcasting Commission, had impeccable manners when he needed them and could discuss opera.. None the less, he was known to walk up to women and say “I’m Australian. My name’s Brian. Wanna f**k?” He told me that this worked often enough for him not to waste time and money on other methods.
    Bit like the friend of mine who had some little cards printed " Hallo, I think you are the most beautiful girl in the room and I would love to take you to bed, if you like the idea, smile, if not, please give the card back as it was expensive"
    He would give the card to his target and go back to the bar while she read it. They always smiled, then realised what they had done. Still, like above, it worked often enough.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    West London
    Posts
    2,927

    Default Re: Cruising under Sail: the facts

    Quote Originally Posted by westhinder View Post
    Please define ‘Cultured Ozzie’
    Well as a pomme once said, "Oz is 90% arid desert & 10% cultural desert".

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